Sometimes you don’t choose Grandparenting,
Grandparenting chooses you.
My husband of almost three years, never planned on having children. Now, he’s the most amazing Grandpa you can imagine! Sometimes our choices early in life, change as we get older. I’m sure we’ve all experienced this in one form or another.
My husband, James, was perfectly happy just being an Uncle to his sister’s two children. He decided early in his adulthood, that he did not want to have kids. The whole diapers, screaming, puking, non-sleeping parent thing was not for him.
James had been married before, but they didn’t have children together. So at the time that I met him, he was divorced and living a single life as a software engineer. Kind of solitary, but it suited him. James is not what you would call a socialite. Don’t get me wrong, he’s great company and has a wonderful personality, but he’s also very happy just coding…doing his thing.
As with many of us, blended families are quite common. There are marriages, divorces, adoptions, or just choosing who your family is. Family isn’t always a bloodline, It’s a heart-line. Your tribe.
Knowing very well that I had three children and two grandchildren as we were dating, there was that very real possibility that they could someday also be his. My children were grown and my grandkids were seven and nine at the time we met. I think it was easier for him to imagine being in our lives. It wasn’t like he was becoming “dad” to toddlers. It was more like stepping into their lives as a friend. Not really having to worry about raising them, the sleepless nights or possible failures all of us parents experience. I know many men do “step-in” to the parenting role early in their children’s lives. I have utmost respect for each and every one of you.
Anyone can be a Father, but It takes someone special
to be a Dad…or Grandad.
In addition to being an awesome “friend” to our children and grandchildren, James’ role as “step-dad and grandpa” come so naturally to him now. Even though he chose to not have biological children when he was younger, it really suits him well in his role as Grandpa James. He’s the perfect counselor and role model for our children, and the most amazing Grandpa I could ever imagine.
The silliness, running around the yard, doing puzzles, putting up tree swings, playing with play dough, teaching them how to chip wood, lots snuggles and video games…He’s it. The perfect Grandpa. Protective in every possible way, and always has the kids, and grandkids best interests at heart.
I never really had a Grandpa in my life. The year I was born, my paternal grandfather passed away. My Grandmother Morris was his wife, the most amazing grandma that ever lived. I heard he was just as awesome as she was, but I never knew him. My maternal Grandfather was a very distant man that traveled often. I saw him, I knew what he looked like, but being a grandpa wasn’t really his thing.
With every passing day, I love James even more. So many of you awesome Grandpas (biological and chosen) don’t realize how much of an impact you’re having on those little human’s lives. You’re wonderful, you’re loved and you’re important. Thank you for being you.
“Making Grandparenting Glorious!”